TheStartOfMyRebelCareer }} [Nellen]

[_KAT]

Cate Brooklyn

10:06pm

Cate shivered slightly. Her cheery blue coat was usually great protection against the cold but then she'd never tested it at night. The yellow scarf she always wore was tucked around her neck, barracading in the warmth. Or trying to. Cate half wished she'd shoved on an extra layer but she'd been too excited about getting outside. For goodness sake, she was going outside at night with a guy. When put like that, she realised how jealous most girls would be of her. This somehow gave her a strange satisfaction. Still, even this little glow could not keep her from feeling the cold start to seep through the material of her coat. She still wore the jeans she had had on during the day, along with a simple t-shirt and fitted hoodie.

The hard part had not been sneaking out, really. It had more been the constant edge of fear of being caught, and having to suppress her urge to giggle hysterically at her own daring. It felt great, to be bending the rules this once. Cate might have to watch that it didn't become a habit. And yet, she could see that it would, if J or anyone ever asked her again.

J. Cate was actually quite nervous about meeting him. He seemed sophisticated, and more practised at... disobeying rules, frankly, it seemed. There was an air of superiority about him. Of course, Cate knoew she was reading far too much into some random IM conversation. He was just a guy. She leaned against the bleacher, wrapping her arms around herself. Her pale blonde hair, for once, was still. The breeze had dropped since the morning, and the stars were beginning to come out. Being Winter, it was already dark. Cate had half expected him to be waiting for her, but the boys dorms were on the floow above and maybe some of the other guys had still been up. That was the problem of living in a first year dorm. All the kids still had bedtimes. Cate pulled her eyes away from the school building and the faint lights eminating from a couple of the windows, and instead looked across the field, towards the forest and beyond that, the lake. She shivered again. Being out alone was actually pretty scary.

[nellen]

J Winters III

Thump. He landed with a gentle grace, unbeknownst even to himself, but fitting to his always surprising personality. A rueful half smile rippling onto features strong and handsome, enough to make any woman’s heart skip a beat at his fleeting gaze. As he turned to ensure the window was propped open for his return; otherwise it was a night under the stars for him, J thought to who he was meeting. It wasn’t necessarily unlike him to hook up with a random girl, but that was in clubs. He didn’t play the field at school, whatever treasures lay hidden. Internally scolding himself for the thought, he corrected his grammar and thinking. He wasn’t ‘hooking up’ with this girl, he was starting her rebel career. Tonight would be like a child’s first steps, small at first but growing bolder with each stride. What was with his mind and metaphors tonight?

Adjusting his black jacket so it encapsulated his torso with the snugness afforded in the sleek leather he chucked the woollen scarf around his neck. A casual gift sent from his sister in Paris, what luxuries she got to enjoy this lad would on occasion dare to think, however most went unappreciated by the spoilt princess. He was allowed to think that wasn’t he? No matter how much brotherly love he mischievously extended the girl was too far up her own ass. But she provided a god laugh at family gatherings. The scarf was a show of what minute care she held for him underlying all the snide remarks and lies she spun as if there was a world shortage of spiders. Whatever faults he held in her taste was not one of them. She knew what he liked, sometimes before even he did. It was unnerving how well she could read him sometimes.

The stars were just appearing in the sky as J strode onto the pitch. Immediately turning towards the bleacher underneath which he’d arranged to meet Cate. Tightening the scarf and pulling up his collar, J dug his hands into the pockets of his bomber jacket. Fingering the engraved white lighter inside with boredom. He didn’t like to walk alone, when he had he opportunity of company and in anticipation of that he’d grown bored with his own. The though train was complicated to even J, when he was the one who felt it’s every presence.

Only as he drew nearer did J make out the shadow of a person. A girl, and unless there was some odd twist of fate he’d be willing to bet his own hand it was her. He guessed her feelings as with each silent step he walked closer. She was afraid and unnerved. He wasn’t being arrogant in the assumption more sympathetic. It was how he’d felt when G and he first broke the rules. That night had started more than a forest fire. It had blazed into a roaring kinship of the two boys, binding them together for the definite future. J fondly reminisced for a blink before he stepped behind Cate. Debating which way to make his presence known to her, for she was staring off across the field.

“Hey” Lyrical vocals rippled with the word, as he watched it escape into the air. It was that cold out, he thought as a striking smile settled into place upon his face with simplistic pleasure at his characteristic ease of person. And the anticipation of meeting someone knew. Part of being an inmate not only of this infirmary but of his family and their whole crowd meant meeting new people and meeting them at 10.08pm at night was kinda out of the question. But since most of his life was made up of breaking the rules, it only increased his pleasure of making her acquaintance. Whatever.

[_KAT]

The darkness, that had been slowly closing in around her, abruptly receded as a voice behind Cate made her twirl round in a flurry of blue. His soft voice had cut through the heavy silence, although it held an authorative, seductive air, one Cate might have associated with the smooth villain in a film. However, all she was concerned with was the immediate comfort she felt. Being on her own was not something Cate was scared of, but it was something she was not accustomed to. Her parents had hardly ever left her for a minute, and she was almost always surrounded by friends these days.

As, she turned, so she caught sight of the figure standing behind her. He was close; she was amazed and a little unnerved that she hadn't heard him. She had probably just been deep in thought. Thoughts that now, she couldn't even remember. Cate was rarely flustered, and she remained silent for a few quick moments, taking the scene in. This was J. It had to be. Unless, by some weird happening, someone else was prowling the grounds at night. Cate pushed all thoughts of 'prowling' out of her mind. It didn't make her feel any more comfortable.

He was tall, and it made Cate feel quite inferior, if not intimidated. His hair was short, but styled nicely. In the dark, she could not tell its exact colour, although she at least knew it was brown. He had a striking, handsome face, one that Cate knew would make most girls swoon. Heck, she was having trouble collecting her thoughts looking at him. And she did recognise him, as someone she'd seen around school, as someone she'd heard girls talk about, as someone undoubtably popular. Revelling in her luck at finding him, she let a grin slide onto her pale face.

"Hey," she replied, feeling the awkward simplicity of her own answer and finding herself irritating, while at the same time trying to grasp onto the confident person she usually was. She pushed herself out of her leaning posture, flicking her hair over her shoulder and trying not to imagine what his hair would feel like under her fingers. "This is cool," she said, a hand gesturing vaguely around as she watched her own breath rise as a pale mist in front of her, "Kinda crazy, but cool." Correction, her mind told her, This is incredibly crazy. And absolutely amazing.

[nellen]

He watched with a silent complacency, studying her whilst it appeared she did the same. He let his eyes appreciatively glide up and down her, more down than up because it appeared that she was markedly shorter than him. A common occurrence for J since he towered over the majority of the school, including faculty. Her hair was long or shoulder length at least and most likely blonde. Eyes of blue to match as well. Cate’s face matched the description she gave of herself online. Or at least what he’d read into it. Impressions could be deceiving and he should know that more than the next person but still he liked to trust in man kind occasionally.

As she smiled J found himself celebrating his fortunate luck of meeting her. And he guessed that this would have been the only way. He wasn’t necessarily the type to mix with first years, female or not. J tended to keep to his own group, the more mature half of the school. Supposedly. Tilting his head ever so slightly as she gestured with her hand J couldn’t help but feel a tint of awkwardness seeping in. It was bound to happen, but he had almost been determined not to let it, after seeing her.

“Definitely. And hopefully the start of something fun.” He let the words hang there devilishly. Unsure himself of the intent behind them and secretly hoping (possibly for the first time in his life) that she would take it at face value, meaning the beginning of her rebel career. Otherwise J could see himself living up to his well-defined reputation that he had miraculously earned here at Ludus Elementum. Not that he wouldn’t be glad to, but it would feel wrong. Especially since she was only a first year and he a fourth year. A worldlier one at that.

“Perhaps a more substantial introduction would be best, so we know who we are,” His smile was bright as he spoke. Eyes shining earnestly, tinted with shine of danger. This was his game and he knew how to play. “Jonathan Winters III,” a wickedly handsome smile before he quickly continued “at your service.” And with that he tilted his head with the formality now only seen in old movies. When guys who didn’t know him, and even those who did, saw him act in a similar fashion they always assumed with a strong certainty that it was all an act. It wasn’t. He really was this genuinely mad. But it came in waves G said. And never without a certain degree of responsibility and awareness.

[_KAT]

He was silent as he studied her. Cate had the self-confidence not to get self-conscious with people watching her, but even she managed to feel uncomfortable. It felt too personal, and she almost wished she'd dressed up a bit more. But, what you saw was pretty much what you got with Cate. She did dress like a tomboy sometimes, but she could actually appear quite feminine when you got beneath the surface. Her words did not hang in the air long, something she was glad about considering they had been so lame. At his minute nod, she found herself letting go of held breath.

At his reply however, she couldn't help a wry smile envelope her face as her eyebrows reached the heavens. She was not unawre that his words could have meant more than one thing, but he seemed aware of this too and did not add anything to them for some time. "Yeah," she replied, "I could get used to this." Her gaze flicked back to his face as she said this, imagining what it would be like to tell pele she'd got with a fourth year. They'd never believe her, she supposed. And quickly, she pushed these thoughts aside, because he'd obviously been talking about her wonderful rebel career and she was running away with herself.

His smile was dazzling as his next words filled the space between them, and Cate couldn't help but give one in return. Jonathan Winters III. The way he said it, musical, accompanied by a smile which could have been a whole orchestra. There was nothing simple about it, though Cate knew this was for show. At your service. Oh boy, what Cate could do with that.

She took a step towards him, mimed a sweeping curtsey though she wasn't wearing a skirt and replied, "Catelyn Alexia Brooks, Sir." Although it didn't take long for her to snap out of the moment. She wasn't so good at acting as him, and couldn't prevent a smile that disguised a laugh from sliding onto her face. J was certainly something.

[nellen]

At her smile J knew that she’d read the alternative meaning that he’d unknowingly spoken in his words. A mental slap on the forehead would have to suffice, that was until she spoke. A warm curl twirled his lips as Cate spoke. Either she was playing along or had rescued him from his mistake. Hopefully it was the latter otherwise he could imagine all sorts. And he knew it was in his grasp and nature to fulfil those devious thoughts. She was only a first year and he had to remind himself of his manners at that thought. He may be starting her rebel career, but this wasn’t the time for him to be, well him.

At his alternative introduction J could see the doubt in her eyes before she played along. At that he stifled laughter, for nearly everyone who witnessed this introduction would either laugh in his face and carry on like nothing happened, or introduce themselves like a normal person. Barely anyone but G and a few good mates played along. Girls usually flustered and smiled blindingly, few if any ever replied with the same tone and style. He liked it. Probably because it showed she was willing to play along with him, instead of the other reasons that flitted across his mind.

One thing was she most likely assumed he was acting, putting on a show for her. Well all she’d have to is wait and get to know him to find out he was never acting, he was being J. Fact of life, fact of J. As her words faded into the air, J thought about what next. She was out and maybe that was good enough for the first time. It was exactly how he’d started 10 years ago. He wondered that if he told Cate that she’d feel inadequate. Maybe best not to then, he thought. As his fingers clenched and unclenched he felt something cold and metallic against them. A coin. How symbolic. J was in unknown waters and he had two choices before him; be the ass he had a reputation for being, or be the good guy, genuine, like he really was. Or so he liked to think.

Gripping the metal tight in his fingers J pulled his hand out and flipped the coin in the air. Heads he was nice, Tails he was the man he was assumed to be. Internally J was hoping for Heads. It gave him a chance to make a genuine female friend, one that he hadn’t and couldn’t through his own moral code sleep with. In a split second the metal circle cut through the air, spinning as it went. His persona tonight and Cate’s impression of him depended on that small metal dial. Mentally crossing his fingers J felt the side that had landed in his palm. Heads. A small puff of air escaped his lips as he smiled to Cate. She’d guess he was mad for sure now, but maybe he was.

His eyes lit up as a brainwave skidded to a halt in his estranged mind. A walk. It was simple, yes, but it meant they could talk and there wouldn’t be as much pressure. Plus it would warm them up, because he didn’t know about Cate but he was getting tingle down his back from the cold. Something J wasn’t about to admit to easily. “Fancy a walk? I know it’s not exactly rebel,”

[/b] He paused to shrug and let a laugh fall from his deep vocals, “But I forgot the alcohol.”[/b] Another swift laugh and he stepped forward. Another swift laugh and he stepped forward. Holding out his arm if she wanted to take it. It seemed gentlemanly, and he didn’t think it implied anything except he was being nice. A polite gesture and a display that he was trying earnestly. This was unknown territory for him. Surprisingly.


[/blockquote][/blockquote][/size]

[_KAT]

He seemed thoughtful. Cate didn't really understand why this surprised her, but for some reason it did. Perhaps it was because he had seemed so quick, impulsive, when they had spoken at first and she hadn't been able to watch his mental processes. Cate suffered a small disappointment, but at the same time took some comfort in the fact that he wasn't, in fact, a God. But also, he perhaps was not as much of an idiot as his reputation apparently said he was. Still, Cate was quite happy to watch him. She had thought for a moment that he might laugh at her, but he seemed to control himself. And Cate realized she'd been ready to laugh at him just a minute ago.

He dug in his pockets, and Cate was feeling the awkwardness set in when he pulled something out. A moment later there was a shimmer in the air and Cate realized it was a coin. Welcome back, Mr. J, with his fancy tricks and slick agility. Or possibly just an odd tradition. Basing his life on luck perhaps? Cate was struck by this delicious idea of impulsiveness. She'd always been one to act on a whim but luck was all the more exciting. She watched it spin in the air for less than a second, until it came to rest back on his hand. If Cate had done that she'd probably have dropped it. He was silent for another moment, the coin in his fingers. Then, abruptly, he uttered a small sigh and a smile lit his face again.

Confused and slightly weak at the knees, Cate eyed him suspiciously. Then, at his suggestion, she gave a small laugh. "And I was so looking forward to the vodka," she replied, wondering where the sarcasm had come from. Perhaps it was catching, his irony. It made her feel more confident, although she would never feel too comfortable around J; he was unpredictable, you could never be sure what he would do next and it put Cate on edge. She'd met guys like him back home, but they'd always been real jerks. She was still wondering whether he was going to turn out to be the same. There was mischief in his manner, but when he had suggested a walk he had seemed sincere with his innocence. Waay to confuse her.

Realizing she hadn't yet graced him with an answer, she narrowed her eyes at his outstretched arm. To take it might be suggestive but to leave him hanging seemed cold. Fighting a momentary mental battle, Cate eventually stepped forward and slipped her arm into his. "They won't miss me," she said, a hint of humor in her voice though she spoke the truth. None of her friends were in the same dorm as her. In some ways this was a downer; she had no one to stay up late talking to. But in others, it was kind of nice; it meant no one had to see her morning hair and she could keep up the pretense of being the person who was always looking wide awake. She kept her eyes ahead as they began to walk, although of course every so often her eyes would slide over to him, taking in the moonlight, frustratingly-unreadable expression on his face. "Is this the part where I ask you to tell me your life story?" Cate inquired. Again, she was half-joking, but not being used to such situations she felt uneasy, and unpracticed, and even an annoying doubt that he would really enjoy her company. Still, nothing could really put a damper on her mood.

[nellen]

When she mimicked his manner in her sarcastic reply to the alcohol J knew that Cate wouldn’t need much pushing to reach the average level of defiance. But guidance was essential and small steps ideal. Like no Vodka to begin with, however much she “hoped” for it. As her small arm slipped into his, J moved his legs to wander mode. See where their feet took them was a risky jump but one that J was sure of himself in. “Me too, “He smiled ravishingly before continuing “But I think my friends drank it all last week when they were celebrating.” He smiled as he looked down at her, the moonlight adequate enough to bathe her face with its soft subtle lighting.

There was tint of sadness to Cate’s next words and he wondered how they could be true. She seemed full of life to him, but J wasn’t even sure to trust his own opinion on such a topic, he didn’t even feel sure to trust it when on the subject of himself. That was the mystery of J, he could be laid out for all to see and yet you still wouldn’t’ see everything. He always had something up his sleeve, it was just his way. “That surely can’t be true? I’m sure you’d be missed.” He looked cautiously at her this time, wondering if what she’d said in jest really meant what it sounded like.

Hoping so, even though his tone had been light when speaking, because it was a pity for someone like her, so charming to feel that way. Although he himself had never particularly felt that; well here and with friends anyway, but family were different. His couldn’t care less. Poor little rich boy, how pathetic he felt when he heard that phrase. It summed him up yet didn’t even scratch the surface of what brewed beneath his confident exterior. But no one saw that side except G and J knew it was going to stay that way for a long time. He couldn’t risk confiding in girlfriends when they changed almost like the seasons.

“Your insane if you want to hear my life story” He laughed genuinely in part but a slight twinge filling the corners of his consciousness. “I’m that poor little rich boy, who gets what he wants and ends up wanting nothing.” Laughter again cracked from his vocals. He knew people envied him and didn’t believe him when he said it was tiring and restricted. He may not have money restrictions but social ones came thick and fast. He was only allowed to date certain girls. Only allowed certain friends. Wasn’t allowed to be a normal teenager and chill but excel and continue the family empire. And most importantly marry well, marry rich, marry royalty if he could.

J guessed that if he replayed what he said he’d want to hit himself in the face, but he’d said it and now he hoped she wouldn’t pity him but laugh at him, like he and G always did. It was the only way to cope with the stupidity of hating this life. “I’m surprised I have friends at how much I’m a spoilt brat,” He smiled devilishly as he said this. He was being an arrogant ass now, and it suited him sometimes. It was him sometimes. He was many things, and he knew it. No continuity or consistency existed within his confident mind except the complete randomness and madness.

“Hows your first year holding up, then? Fun? Or reaching that painful stage of boredom?” A cheery smile slipped easily onto his façade as he turned the questions to her instead of him. An inquisitive streak growing with each word he spoke. He wanted to know about her, know her intimately instead of her body like he’d usually end up doing. This was his problem…one of them anyways. He glanced down and at his surroundings as he listened patiently to her; awaiting an answer. Patience? J? Who knew?

[_KAT]

The began to walk, an easy, strolling pace, though Cate had to move quicker to keep up with J's long stride. He walked gracefully, confidently, and his pride was evident. Cate's parents had once told her that you could tell a lot about a person from their walk, even before talking to them, but she'd never put too much behind it. Because if she hadn't talked to J she'd never have known he wasn't a total jerk. Her idle musings were interrupted by his reply to her comment about the drink. He smiled, and so of course most of his next sentence was lost while Cate recovered, although she caught a few words. "Celebrating?" She enquired, wondering if there'd been an occasion. Not that guys generally needed an occasion to drink.

His next words were more serious; perhaps even contained a note of concern, though Cate wouldn't put money on him being able to express that. She realised too late she'd managed to say something to kill the mood. It wasn't that Cate suppressed generally depressing feelings, she was usually just too optimistic to let them affect her at all. She must have had her guard down further than she'd realised. That was obviously what the late night was doing to her. "Perhaps," she eventually replied, "Although they'll probably just be glad to get rid of my noise when they're trying to sleep." This was followed by a trademark laugh. Back to reality for Miss Brooks.

His next words, she also laughed at. You're insane if you want to hear my life story. It sounded like a line out of a movie. "Then maybe I'm insane," she said with a wry smile. Of course, it was her curiousity arising again. It was something she'd never been able to quell, no matter how many times her parents had told her off for being nosy. She just liked to know other peoples' business. However, his next words were even more intriguing. She laughed with him, but somehow his words didn't fit with his cheery tone. Perhaps there was yet another side to J; a more sincere side? While Cate had always worn her heart on her sleeve, he was frustratingly secretive. He never meant what he said, or said what he meant. Reading between the lines was a constant occupation when he was around. Cate just hoped she could read him right.

A spoilt brat was what he referred to himself as. Cate felt a pang of sympathy. For someone who presented himself with so much certainty he sure didn't seem to have a high self-esteem. But how was he expecting her to respond? She was silent for a few moments. "I'm not surprised," she then said in a low voice, and after a short pause a grin reappeared on her face as she added, "You can be whoever you want to be, right?" Brows raised, she let the triumph of a serious piece of advice run through her. Cate wasn't used to being the supporter. Especially not of someone older than her. And someone male.

She was glad when J's voice turned casual again; it felt easier to talk when she didn't have to think about how deep he could be - better to think of him as the popular, cool guy everyone else saw, because otherwise what would she be getting herself into? Of course, she realised she was an unlikely confidante for him anyway. "How's my first year holding up?" she repeated thoughtfully. "Well, to be honest, I hoped for more drama. I mean, us elementalists are a boring lot." This was accompanied by a wry smile, though, on a slightly more serious note, she added, "It's not been totally crap though. A few moody teachers, a few homesick kids... overall, alright. Does it get better?"

[nellen]

As he walked on with an easy confidence J looked to Cate and with that sweeping stare soon took in that fact that his stride was just a touch to long for her legs. This was not an unknown phenomenon to him, but most of the time he was pratting and running about with G, too careless or arrogant to notice such a thing. Why was he trying to be the gentleman with her? A quick sharp reminder blared that he’d flipped for this chance to be even a hint of what he hoped he really was or even at this point could turn out to be. Her inquiry wasn’t a surprise, he almost subconsciously left his words hanging, allowing for an easier conversation topic and one that would flow. This was not he occasion for uncomfortable silence and he felt assured to never let it rest between them tonight.

“My friends don’t need much occasion for a celebration, but this was an exception. Surprisingly.” He paused to smile and smile reminiscently to himself, not caring if she was bothered but more the memory of that night and those like it. He enjoyed them, and half the time felt like he lived for them. “It was one of the guys birthday, you see. And I guess they were making up for the lack of bars and clubs.” He laughed softly at this, because he knew they were actually just drinking because someone provided a half assed excuse for the destruction of their livers.

Her answer confused J slightly and he looked on with curiosity. “Your noise? Sounds interesting,” He laughed gently at this and smiled dashingly before continuing. “They’d be wrong,” a short pause ensued as he turned to look slightly more earnestly at Cate“If they were glad to be rid of you.” He knew that his words were no real comfort when it was impossible to judge their sincerity. Sometimes J was unsure of the sincerity in his own tone but he hoped she trust the effort he’d made to import their small comfort.

J enjoyed the fact that she laughed along with him and he appreciated and was pleased exceptionally at her verbal response. "Maybe I’m insane" showed that either she was learning quickly or that she didn’t necessarily need his help but more the company he provided. But this was beyond J as he scanned Cate quizzically whilst maintaining a soft deep laughter and devilishly charming smile. “Maybe you are.” A wry smile tinted with pure gentleman like charm escaped onto his handsome façade.

The few moments silence panged J and he knew he stepped his foot in it that was until she replied quietly. She wasn’t surprised? That news nearly soared through him if it weren’t for the fact that she didn’t know him well enough for that to be true to anyone but herself. It was his appearance and reputation that made it impossible to think otherwise of him. Or so he thought and ardently wished against. Her next words were the ones that really imparted comfort of some sort.

He let himself feel it and relax into the moment. Not that he wasn’t already but he wasn’t stupid enough to let his guard down like he did with friends. J was the type who never let it down entirely, ever. So it made this evening or night so much harder. The likely hood of a long lasting relationship being born with him being mysterious and an enigma was small. “Right. If only everyone thought like that. If only everyone was like that.” He laughed softly, and smiled through the twinge of sadness and almost mourning her felt at those words. And their concept. If only.

She seemed happier with the lighter tone of conversation and so was J. It was easier on the mind to not make her part of his messed up life, however perfect it appeared to outsider eyes. He listened to her talk without feeling it was desperate for him to be speaking, but listening contentedly. Something he failed because he was just to involved as a listener. “I don’t think we’re all that boring. But there’s definitely a trend of it at the moment.” He laughed at this knowing it was true and relishing in the absurdity. “Better? That’s kinda hard. It becomes familiar … you just get used to it,” As he shrugged his shoulders all he could do was laugh at himself and his answer. “But I wouldn’t trust my opinion. I never started out as the most normal of elementalists,” How could you be normal and an elementalist? He mused to himself.

“My first experience certainly wasn’t the most positive.” He lifted his hand in front of him to show her the thin wavy scars that blazed up from the tips of his fingers. The paler skin seemed to illume in the moonlight. Tucking his hand back into his pocket J began questioning again. “How did you discover your element? Or is it too personal. I know some people don’t like to share that information.” He smiled dazzlingly and continued on walking. He cold be quite attentive when he wanted to be.

[_KAT]

J seemed happy recalling the festivities; it was obvious he valued his friends, something that surprised Cate. She had generally thought that those popular, beautiful people just used each other: for drink, money, more friends, romance. It was generally what the media suggested. However, J was proving many of her original theories wrong tonight, something she found both interesting and hopeful. After all, it was strange for her to want to be one of the people she should, in effect, hate, but if they weren't as bad as they seemed... perhaps it could be feasible. Maybe when she was taller, she thought with the hint of a smile.

His next words, she could not distinguish the tone of, but she had to laugh at his comment about her noise. “My laptop,” she assured him, “I’m usually up to all hours on it.” At his next words she offered a small smile, never sure whether to be comforted or suspicious by J’s seemingly sweet side. Cate supposed every guy must have a scrap of decency somewhere, although she hadn’t expected J’s to be so evident. Was it too much to hope he’d uncovered it just for her? It wasn’t something Cate would hold out for, but she still appreciated it. Her only reply was a shrug; close friends were not something Cate had ever felt she needed. Not until now, when she realized someone to talk to could actually be a good idea.

Maybe you are. It sent a shiver through Cate. His voice suited those soft, devilish lines. His school appearance suited him well, all in all, enough for everything to seem out of place when he started being serious. Cate couldn’t decide which J she preferred, or which one she thought was genuine. It was better to take him at face value, find an answer for each thing he said depending on his mood.

He was silent for a few moments and she wondered what he was thinking. She supposed her little pearl of wisdom paled in comparison with the problems he seemed to have. It was strange how you just didn’t think of rich kids having troubles. Cate’s life tended to be much simpler. She was on fine terms with her parents, the teachers, and her classmates. Maybe being popular meant you had to step on some toes. Kinda like she was doing now, outside after lights out, walking with a fourth year guy. And so she left him to his thoughts, instead turning to her own until he wanted to speak again. Her musings often flitted from topic to topic, a short attention span meaning she could never wonder over something too long. This rule was broken a little by J of course, who seemed to have enough sides to keep her mind busy for years.

If only everyone was like that. That’s what he said. Cate glanced up at him. “Then maybe you’re living in the wrong circle,” Cate replied. Carelessly, she realized a moment later, and quickly added, “Says the one with no circle whatsoever. Sorry.” That was, perhaps, one of the better things about Cate. Genuine apologies were never difficult and if she did something wrong, she was over it and improving immediately. And she didn’t hold grudges. Not often, anyway. This quality balanced out her judgmental side in a way. It also meant she spent a lot of her life apologizing for blurting out all sorts of things.

Talk of lighter subjects ensued, and Cate was cheered by the notion that she could hardly make mistakes when such trivial matters were being discussed. His answer to her previous question was perhaps not what she was looking for, but still comforting. I never started out as the most normal of elementalists. She glanced at him questioningly; but didn’t have to wait long as the scars on his hands became visible before them in the pale light. Cate’s eyes widened in surprise, but she held comment, presuming J had been a trouble maker most of his life. He was already beginning a new trail of thought.

“Well, to be honest there isn’t much danger in discovering you’re an Aeris,” she replied to his question, “My parents are both elementalists so they pretty much knew I would be. I hoped I’d be in Ignis like my dad but I couldn’t do anything with fire. My first memories of using air are sitting on the kitchen floor with mum trying to teach me some simple commands.” She laughed, a little half-heartedly. “Haven’t really lived, have I?” she glanced up at him, half-smiling. “But yeah, I was so excited on my first day! I think I just expected to pick it up easily. It’s actually... kinda hard.” She concluded, another sheepish grin emerging onto her face as she sought to hide her disappointment. “It only makes me want to try harder though, right?"

[nellen]

Her laptop. Well that was better than his insinuating tone. Something he hoped she hadn’t picked up on. Noise meant many things to him and friends; especially late at night. But enough thinking about the sordid company he kept with their pathetically simple and dirty minds. Because genuinely that’s all most of them were: A mixture of shallow incomplete persons whose existent was based on money, alcohol and sex. He comment on up to all hours would help explain their meeting, for him tonight’s excursion onto his computer had been executed on a whim because of a text sent by uncle at his failure to read email often.

Miles had updated him only on the status of his sister’s unmarried life. The unmarried par the focus of his parents turmoil. They couldn’t care if J was being regularly set detentions. Or even put in isolation. Expelled wouldn’t catch their notice either. No. His sister’s failure to keep a man or find one half decent enough in the first place was aging them terribly. With his mother in the beginnings of her transformation to Mrs Bennet. The nervous wreck who thought only of money and marriage; and not often her own.

Neither J nor Cate spoke during the interval his words having said enough. It only was only when she declared him to be living in the wrong circle that J began to intently listen. The wrong circle? Could he be? Maybe it wouldn’t explain his problems but it would lessen them. No, if anything they’d be heightened. From a young age he’d kept to his kind as it were. The other kids who had a trust fund and a house in the Hampton’s for the weekend. And even then he was beyond their league. This wasn’t a question of wrong circle it was a question of wrong J. Wrong personality. Wrong freaky genetic curse that made him able to literally spit fire. If he wanted to which was never.

“No need for an apology. You can say what you think. And you shouldn’t be afraid to.” He smiled at this. And honestly wished she had never apologised. It only served to encourage his self questioning, but he wasn’t necessarily prepared to share that gem of an insight. “You have a circle I bet. Just not quite the same.” He continued to smile dashingly. A slight twist glinting in his eye as he did. Maybe he was playing mind games tonight. Although in essence J was a mind game. He couldn’t tell you what he was thinking. Through confidentiality and the fact that it was so random he ought to be committed half the time.

He watched the surprise show on her face, eyes growing in size. He didn’t know if it was the common reaction or if other people were more adept and prepared at hiding it. He didn’t notice and didn’t care. They were a reminder of why he was here. Not just being in possession of this power but learning to control it and not repeat past mistakes. Unless fully prepared and focussed of course. “You can ask. You can even look closer if you want to,” He shrugged off-handidly “I don’t mind. I guess, in a perverse way… I’m proud of them.” He smiled quizzically more for the sake of being able to freely show some human expression other than the usual on his handsome façade.

His smile quickly grew to a charming curve of his lips before her voice cut through the air again. “Lucky you. You actually knew before it happened.” A mysterious charm swept across his face. No sooner gone that it arrived. “I wouldn’t judge yourself too soon, to harshly now,” He laughed softly with a voice that was seeped in mystery before continuing in a velvet voice “We all expect that. I don’t know anyone who didn’t. But you soon learn,” He paused to smile and laugh. Checking his watch for no reason except it was something to do. At this point, walking along with Cate; a girl without three inches of make-up and plastic surgery (or he didn’t want to think offensively) but romance on her mind J felt quietly and very slightly contempt and couldn’t care for the time.

“And that’s all you can do really, try harder.” A small sigh flew silently from his lips before a gentle smile settled in place. And like always it held a hint of devil’s charm. “Academia is not my forte though, and I don’t tend to make much of an effort, like I said online.” Instead of smiling with his mouth this time, J smiled with his eyes; their colour shining in the soft light, before clouding their natural colour with fire like warmth. An annoying thing about Ignis was the fact that it tended to be obvious when he used his talent. Red and Orange flames were an annoying give away.

[_KAT]

[ sorry for the wait ^^ ]

No need for an apology. You can say what you think. Cate took some comfort in his words, glad that she had not offended him and surprised he was so laid-back. Of course, he always gave that impression but you never could tell; in Cate's experience most of the time if they acted relaxed, they weren't. It was an art. Or a cover, depending on which way you looked at it. Being ever the optimist by nature, Cate tended to see the best in everything, including people. She was one of these 'it could be worse' people. Most of the time.

At his next words, Cate half shrugged. "I guess," she said thoughtfully, "But I'm kinda... in so many, I can never be properly part of any, if you see what I mean." That was perhaps Cate's greatest downfall; she was, in essence, a social butterfly, having lots of friends but no one very close. She did have a few back home, which she kept in touch with, but since moving to Ludus Elementum had found herself quite at a loss. She supposed at first she had been unwilling to replace her friends, to make new ones, and so by the time she realised they would be useful they had already cliqued around her. However, it did mean she could basically hang out with anyone she liked. And it had turned her into the confidently sociable person she was today.

"I dont think I'd want to get any closer to those," she replied with a laugh. His next words hardly surprised her - guys tended to be that way: always seeking the next thing that they could show off. Male pride probably. "Was it very painful?" She then enquired, a little sympathetically although he hardly encouraged it with his off-hand tone. However his smile this time was softer, less likely to dazzle. It showed some simple friendly nature, and Cate was able to return it without feeling like she had anything to live up to in his presence.

Of course, it was quickly gone and replaced by his usual charm as he spoke again. "I suppose it was lucky. When I first got here and heard about everyone else it seemed pretty dull, but I guess it must be worth something; I mean, it brought me here." The end of the statement was accompanied by an easy smile. Despite not always showing it, Cate loved Ludus Elementum, with all its freedom and differences. It made her feel very independant, something she'd not had much experience of up until now. And she didn't even feel that homesick. She'd never really been suited to the quiet life her parents led.

"Yeah, I'm sure I'll get the hang of it eventually," she agreed, a little dryly, as she tried to think of how many times people had said that to her over the months. Previously it had always sparked a new determination but nowadays she was happy just to crawl along, putting in the effort but not spending her energy wishing and hoping for any drastic improvement. As he sighed she glanced at him, though in moments the expression had vanished and only a smile rested on his lips. Ever mysterious, was J.

As he spoke again, Cate was intrigued. She had expected him to be the guy who was good at everything, and bascically topped everyone. That's what peoples' first guess was. Cate had never been academically prone; school was just something she had to do in order to prepare her for the 'real world', but she guessed once she left education would no longer be one of her priorities. Lots of people managed to lead good lives without it. Her mother had dropped out of uni and still had a nice house and a family. Although, family didn't appeal to Cate yet either.

The were reaching the trees, and the darkness seemed much blacker now. Cate came to a halt, hardly realising how far they'd come until now. Glancing back, she could see the dark silhouette of the school, with only a few little squares of light where lights were still on. As her gaze returned to J, she could his eyes were alight, dancing. It was quite majestic. Cate wondered if she was the only elementalist who wished they were different. Ignis was such an amazing gift, perhaps not so versatile but wonderful to watch. However, Cate could hardly be jealous of J now, not after what he'd told her about his troubles. "We should probably turn around," she suggested, reluctant but conscious that she probably ought to get at least a little sleep. Not that she would be able to sleep; the adrenaline would probably keep her awake.

[nellen]

[What wait? See I didn’t even notice. Says more about me! xD]


The shrug and stumbling words said more to J than perhaps they ought. He knew not belonging even if she couldn’t say it. Did he see what she meant? Yes if what she meant was feeling the on the outside when surrounded by too many faces. Too many people, Too many thoughts; Well maybe that last one was just J. Either way J knew that the loneliest place was often a crowd. But he doubted this was Cate’s fumbled message. “Maybe you ought to explain? For my sake?” A sweet curve alighted the corner of his mouth and a dash of humour dripped gently into his voice. The tone was soft; almost coaxing. He wanted to know. That much was for certain.

Her laugh was nothing special to his scars. It was how he usually treated them. But her laugh was intriguing to him. Was she laughing at getting closer, or at him; and that perverse pride that made him oh so masculine to the eyes of many? Her next question he could almost for sure explain away as curiosity and not concern. Who would care for him? Who would care for the arrogant brat that lets lies role off his tongue as if they were the truth? A master of deception and mystery could never receive genuine affection from a sensible person. Common sense and J had never mixed well in the past. And Cate seemed in possession of a great deal of reality. A true sense of being down to earth. This was only his guess. And it wasn’t to be trusted blindly, much like himself. And the assumptions of his character. He required no definition. And it tended to avoid him, at all cost.

“I can’t really remember pain,” He’d taken a leap and now bared a part of him unknown to all but he and G. Why? He didn’t know. And decided not to think about it, probably for the better. “I don’t think so, all I really remember is the adrenaline and heat.” He paused looking at his fist as he clenched and unclenched it. He didn’t remember pain until the doctors had to examine it. Even then it was nothing but an annoyance just under his skin. A bloody irritating scratch that he couldn’t touch for the thick bandages then plastered over it. It was just heat. A furious heat that blazed through everything including himself. “The heat,” Another short pause as he looked away “it filled everything. The room. The air. … Me.” A small shrug as he fought back the memories before he turned to look at Cate. Waiting for her reaction to this part of him. This part that was afraid. Undoubtedly human.

As soon as he’d been real he returned to himself. Collected, calm and in control. He wished that wasn’t him and more often than not he was more but J was unfathomable even to himself. Too many things, too little patience to discover or accept them all together. He was a shambles of human being. Incomplete and he loathed it. But loved it at the same time. The constant race of not knowing what or who he was. And never quite being in control of it all. So he wasn’t Collected, calm and in control. He looked it. That was enough for most people. It had been enough these past eighteen years. Why should it stop now? He was just beginning to have some true fun with it.

“It’s better than more than half the school’s experience.” He looked at her with mystery spiralling in his eyes. A coy smile and a swift laugh falling from handsome jaws with deep vocals. “You should feel proud, privileged even. Don’t be thinking it’s dull. I bet you wouldn’t change it for the world.” He smiled warmly. He knew from his own personal experience that however much people complained and put down this school, their past or anything that actually made them who they were and shaped part of their whole persona, they wouldn’t change it for the world. He knew it because he did it. He moaned about his family, his life, his money, his friends, and this school but never would he want to change anything of it. That’s why he was perversely proud of his scars. They reminded him of this. They made him remember his past. And that night that brought him here. That gave him knowledge of a gift maybe not from a higher calling but with the power to give him freedom if he wanted it from all he supposedly loathed. And did. But he wasn’t going to change it.

“Of course you will. I’m not sure if you’d be allowed to leave if you didn’t.” He laughed at this sentiment. Would they, could they really hold you back if you didn’t master your gift. He supposed, depending on the element that they might keep an eye on you. And your degree. A 1st degree anything could have a real bad effect on the outside community if they didn’t master their gift. He laughed again in amusement to this thought. “It’s not that hard. And anyway I bet you’re just being modest.” He smiled charmingly at her. Flattery. Hmmm would it work? Or was he just playing to his predefined persona decided by the people who knew him least. Ooh this boy was a pessimist. And a darn good one at that. He could be deep and thoughtful whilst looking like he could charm the knickers of a catholic virgin. But they didn’t put up much of a fight!

Her intrigue at his words was curious but his was in too much of a confident mood now to let it bug him. He’d let that part seep back in (again) later tonight. Probably when alone or joining the gang with a couple shots of vodka. If there was any left. Playing into his part again. Pity Cate along with the others couldn’t see into his head. But then that would ruin the surprise and that’s just no fun for J. Nor for anyone else really.

He stopped only a step after Cate and turned to look at her before back at the school. They had come far. Far enough for tonight he thought. It was the same sight as always, nothing special to him. But he guessed differently for Cate. Perhaps this was the first time she’d seen it look like this. Majestic. Classic essentially. Fitting with its extraordinary pupils. A mixture of joy, luck and darkness. He’d never seen the similarities between the school and its contents. He wondered what made him see it now. Luck? A smile flitted for a fraction of a second onto his façade, invisible in the shadows.

He turned with a smile at her, knowing the tone in her voice. Understanding it he hoped. “You’re probably right. Some sleep is essential.” His voice held a smile as he looked at Cate. The shadows across her face very different from the first time he saw her. Showing a beauty that he hadn’t noticed before. Elegance.